The Comparison Trap

Updated: May 4


We’ve all heard the quote “comparison is the thief of joy” and yet we all still do it! We compare everything from our houses, cars, bodies, and clothes to relationships, number of likes on social media, success and salaries. It’s crazy! I have found that the older I get, the more things there are to compare. But really, the more I compare myself to others, the more I end up driving myself crazy. After all, there will always be someone who is better off than me, and there is always someone who seems to have it “worse” than me.


Why do we do this to ourselves?


When it comes to fitness and nutrition, comparison can be quite toxic.


We compare our bodies, even though we were all made differently and everyone’s version of their “healthiest self” is going to look a little different. Sometimes we glamourize and idolize people and practices that really are not healthy. We applaud people’s weight loss without really knowing what they’ve put their body and mind through to get there.


We also don’t compare fairly. We like to compare our worst to their perceived best, or we compare ourselves to people who are in a totally different season of life or situation than ours.


When comparing yourself to others, there is nothing to gain, but oh so much to lose! You’re losing valuable time, not to mention your self-esteem, passions and gratefulness. We forget our own value.


Ladies, please stop comparing yourself to others. You don’t need to look like someone else to be loved or valued (or healthy!) It doesn't matter how many friends you have, or what other people think of you. You just need to live your own life and focus on doing your best at whatever you’re doing. So many of the things we waste our time comparing- appearances, social status, wealth, material possessions, popularity etc- don't matter anyway.


What is really important to you? What are your values? Focus on those, instead of what other people are doing, and I promise you’ll be happier and more fulfilled.


In your fitness and nutrition journey, don’t compare your progress OR process to that of others. Focus on what you’re doing, and the ways in which you are improving. All that mental energy that you spend comparing, could be focused on getting you closer to your goals!


So, what can we do to stop comparing ourselves to others? Here are a few strategies I would like to implement more regularly, and maybe you will too:

  • Remember how harmful comparison is, and how yucky it makes me feel.

  • Recognize and celebrate my own successes (no matter how small.)

  • Practice gratitude. I have so much to be thankful for, and I don’t want to waste my time being discontent about a few small things.

  • Limit time on social media. Lately I’ve been practicing only scrolling through social media once per day (this does not include posting, answering DMs or replying to comments.) I have found that when I only go on once per day, there is more volume of content, which makes it easier to scroll by things I don’t really care about. It makes it easier to focus on my own life when I don’t have access to everyone else's lives at all hours of the day.

  • Live intentionally and desire greater things for my life. Instead of striving for success, I desire to do meaningful work and live life with a purpose. Instead of wondering if I measure up socially, I desire to be a kind and loving person to everyone I meet, and especially my friends and family.

My desire for my clients (and for myself) is that we would all know our inherent value, and be able to be confident in ourselves. It breaks my heart to hear of women thinking they’re not good enough because they don’t look a certain way, or do certain things. I know this struggle all too well.


One of the best ways to be confident in yourself and your value is to stop comparing yourself to others!

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